Jesus Died On The Cross For Our Sins

What did i do??!

He was crucified for us under Pontius Pilate, and suffered death and was buried.

Note that even the Nicene Creed doesn't capitalize every word. I suspect this is because it detracts importance from words that are *supposed* to be capitalized. Words like 'Jesus'. Why you goin round on jyte acting like Jesus isn't important, like you're doing? Stop that.

It's probably because Jesus was but one person and this guy is equal to four Jesuses.

for a really close encounter with god, try new improved christianity. now with four jesuses.

Four jesuses plus two mohammeds raised to the buddha equals mythematics.

the first jesus takes you close to god
the second jesus takes you closer still
the third jesus takes you into god's house (heaven) and lets you sit on his big knee
and the fourth jesus takes all of your money.

Amen to that.

jesus apparently didnt die on the cross. He became a vampire or something - its in the bible - The jewish didnt defend him and the romans maintained there civil standards.

and lo, jesus became a big vampire and started sucking the blood out of a load of virgins

i don't remember that bit.

XISTH pay attention next time.

Sorry, ms bananas. will i be punished please?

Well, I heard that there was a trap door or some shit and Jesus just like wiggled out the back or something when no one was looking. Like all sick David Copperfield action and shit. So, no, I think Jesus was smarter than that.

XISTH take off your clothes now and then present yourself to your nearest chicken sexing operation. Tell them her majesty sent you.

It might take a few visits but its a worthwhile experience.

if that's what i have to do to get sexed, i'm on my way. do i have to pretend to be a chicken as well? you probably ought to know that i am capable of flexing my shoulder blades in the manner of a chicken.

Where do you all get your history from? I'm curious cause the events related in this video are quite different.

According to Christianity as I've always heard it preached, Jesus went through the effort to die and suffer for only aportion of humanity's sins. It excludes a huge percentage of humanity that doesn't have faith in Jesus, because Jesus was too incompetent, too petty, or too vain to actually cover all of humanity's sins.

I feel this claim implies for all sin, and that is false. Rather than that Jesus died to atone for some of humanity's sins and to allow a small percentage of humanity into Heaven.

Which, quite frankly, does not impress me.

He was a discriminating feller, that jesus.

All that apostles stuff was an exclusive club for gents in frocks.